I couple of giggles reverberated throughout the crowd showing how uncomfortable it can be to give mention to Buddhism and sex in the same sentence. I’ve seen few brave people provide their take on the questions surrounding “What the Buddha Taught” in relation to this specific topic in both layperson and monastics lives and I’ve been quite reticent myself to provide my take – perhaps out of sheer, adolescent giggilyness for fear of letting my private parts show on this blog.

I was so impressed to see Buddhist scholar José Cabezón tackle the mysteries around sexuality and Buddhism in and article he wrote for the Summer issue of Buddhadharma Magazine. You can check out the article and discussion around this via this link to the Shambhala Sun Space.

I admire José Cabezón’s dedication to exploring and writing about the nature of the label of ‘deviant’ as it is placed on sexual activities that we Westerers take as no big deal in this day and age. The controversy surrounding the Dalai Lama’s comments on homosexuality have caused much rancor and when asked how I can support a belief system that holds homosexuality as wrong, I can only respond that at the time when the sutras were written, the prescription to avoid suffering was to avoid these activities.

Times have changed and we aren’t there anymore, however, in my opinion,  there is so much wrapped up in the context of desire, attachment, ego and self that comes about from our sexuality and can understand how the ancients would believe that sexual activity can take us down a slippery slope (no pun intended).

The notion of the Middle Way is interesting as a means to navigate the choppy waves of sex, but I wouldn’t venture how best to explain how loose and tight strings could be best made into an analogy for use in the bedroom context! I’ll leave that to the more learned practicioners and scholars!!!

You can check out Brad’s response to the question “Are Buddhists Allowed to Jack Off” here:

Now for the answer to the koan, what is the sound of one hand… naw.. I won’t go there…

When I was a wee gal, I remember a friend started the self-titled ‘Trisha Murray School of Boy Kicking’ and asked me if I’d join. She cultivated some fine techniques through the use of a delicate toe tap encased in a brown mary-jane sandal and wanted to bring me along for her journey to rid the schoolyard of creepy, cootie-laden manchilds (or at least the future spawn of that generation of manchilds) . I can’t quite remember if I joined her troupe of merry nut-kickers or if I was more interested in raiding my rock and roll addicted aunt’s closet and listen to her stories of dating not-so pro wrestlers from the local circuit.

Something tells me I chose the latter option, despite how fun and glamorous starting a career as a  juvenile nad kicker sounded at the time.

Well all this being said, a few nights ago I went to see Brad Warner speak during his visit to Montreal. Not to go all “Teen Beat” in discussing the punk rock Buddhaboys; their outfits, hairstyles, tattoos, boyish mannerisms and so on, but I always had more of an affinity for Noah Levine. His writing and teachings resonated with me because the reflected so much gentleness, peace and compassion. With Brad’s writings, I was always left hostile, dismissive and kinda felt like he was really a slack Buddhist who didn’t take the responsibility of being a Zen teacher to heart but looked to provoke the shit out of people.

And this shit provoking is the reason why I am “un-trashing” Brad Warner.

*For the record, I never really trashed him ** much**  in the first place…

When I first started practicing Buddhism, I followed the Shambhala tradition, left by renegade the original Crazy Wisdom Gangster Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche. I appriciated his approach which was so fresh to me. I wasn’t up for being spoon-fed dharma that tasted sugar sweet. I appreciated the medicine. I appreciated sitting and questioning the behaviours and motivations of all people, including teachers and the sangha, however, goodness knows I never really questioned my own behaviours and motivations enough.

Brad’s honesty in his most recent book is remarkable as throughout it, he fully exposes himself, warts and all. In his talk, he said that it was nontraditional as far as a speaking tour for a book considering he was embarrassed to read most of what he had written, considering he trashes himself throughout it. Drug use, marital infidelity, death – all subjects usually taboo or at least avoided in the majority of today’s Buddhist bookshelves, are all covered in his story. What used to annoy me about this porno Buddhist, now makes me admire his honest admissions. Anyone who can answer questions from the audience about whether Buddhists can whack off, is OK by my substandard standards.

I spoke with Brad after the talk and may have frightened him by saying that after reading his books, Suicide Girl articles and blog posts, I often either felt like either punching him or hugging him.(Hey! It’s better than kicking him)

Reading Brad’s writing has helped me so much in my personal practice as it’s helped me to work with my dualistic labels and judging mind. Realizing that teachers are human and no different than us non-realized beings has helped me to loosen up and be less of a fan-girl when relating to folks a bit further on the path than I am or in possession of a robe that they feel has no more street cred than a Misfits tshirt.

What does this have to do with ‘Trisha Murray’s School of Boy Kicking”? Well if I did kick any boys back then, I apologize. I think my trigger foot was motivated out of fear and a lack of understanding more so than out of anger.

Today I’m more apt to start the “TanMcG Hugging School” and have ‘kicked the habit’ of being the hateful kicker I used to be. I guess that’s one of the results of walking the path.

We all put our pants on one kicking foot at a time. Me, Brad, Trisha Murray.

]]> http://fullcontactenlightenment.com/2009/04/the-un-trashing-of-brad-warner/feed/ 1 http://fullcontactenlightenment.com/2009/03/a-review-brad-warners-latest-book/ http://fullcontactenlightenment.com/2009/03/a-review-brad-warners-latest-book/#comments Thu, 19 Mar 2009 02:09:03 +0000 TMcG http://fullcontactenlightenment.com/?p=760

So a few weeks ago I picked up Brad Warner’s new book “Zen Wrapped in Karma Dipped in Chocolate -A Trip Through Death, Sex, Divorce and Spiritual Celebrity in Search of the True Dharma” and with a title this all-encompassing, it truly give a sense of how much Brad manages to cover in this, his third book.
As has always happened with Brad’s books, I’m never left feeling wishy-washy or zombied-out-blissful about his writing style or subject matter. He always manages to evoke a visceral reaction from me. Something which I vitally appreciate in a writer and in someone who is so vocal on the path in a teaching role. I felt the same feelings towards Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche. The stories told about this great ‘crazy wisdom’ master would sometimes make me feel that I was a flake for being so dedicated to this teacher and the Shambhala tradition. Then click… I’d catch myself in judgmental mind. Racing thoughts of how I expect teachers to behave.The expectations. The projections.

Then click… I’d think back to how much I hated being judged as a 16 year old blue haired punk. How I may not have always made the best decisions. How I sometimes am not so pious myself. How my standards shouldn’t necessarily be the model for another person’s behaviour.

Brad’s book is an honest story of a guy who’s just trying to do his best. He’s working with what he’s been dealt and that doesn’t make him any more or less special than the rest of us (sorry Brad- I’m hoping egolessness will prevail in that you don’t take offense to my claim that you’re not special!!!).

In many ways it’s best to seek out those teachers who challenge you, rather than the one’s that pat you on the head and tell you that you are doing great grasshopper. This book was a better read that any of some of the so-called dharma books that I’ve read, purely on the basis of it provoking me in this manner.

For those of you who live in Montreal, Brad Warner will be speaking on 2 occasions:

April 27, 2009 (Mon) Dawson College, 3040 Rue Sherbrooke Est, Montréal, QC H1W, Canada
April 28, 2009 (Tues) 7 pm, Casa Del Popolo 4873 St Laurent, Montréal, QC H2T 1R6, Canada

and for those who live elsewhere, check out this link for information on if the ‘Zen Wrapped in Karma Dipped in Chocolate’ road tour will pull into your town.

Brad’s writing is honest, raw and doesn’t leave me feeling wishy-washy and for that, I fully appreciate what he’s saying. He’s quite critical of the notion of spiritual materialism which is something that I hold in high esteem.

I read this and thought “Holy Buddha Batman!” This is what I’ve been doing all these years on this blog. Picking and choosing selected videos that resonate with me (although many of them are old punkrock or skate videos!)

So here for you dear readers is the day-long TMcG sponsored “Pixelated Buddhist Conference”. Please join in and create your own as I’d love to see what other great Buddhist videos are out there circulating on the web. Drop me a line if you decided to post your own “Pixelated Buddhist Conference”.

Venerable Robina Courtin – “Be Your own Therapist

The 4 Noble Truths – in Claymation

Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche – Spiritual Materialism (2)

Noah Levine- “Anger”

Ram Dass – “on Experience”

Pema Chodron – Why I became a Buddhist

Ethan Nichtern – “One City: A Declaration of Interdependence” reading at Google

His Holiness the 17th Karmapa- “How can we deal with everyday distractions?”

Brad Warner – “Skillful Means”